Benefiting from Conflict

I benefited from conflict the day I quit trying to win.  I heard a professor say, “Conflict can be cancerous or creative.”  His insight helped me see how my determination to make my point in disagreements kept me from solving problems, encouraging communication and sustaining important relationships.  

I am mindful that others fear conflict.  Their fear causes them to hide in hopes their withdrawal from the battle will soften the emotional intensity and protect their feelings.  Others also fearing combat surrender principle for the sake of peace.  Yet others will become highly compliant.  They justify this response on the basis of love and of rescuing relationships.

Conflict, however, introduces the opportunity to express concern for the injured, neglected or offended party.   A spirit of caring sets the tone for dealing with friction and misunderstanding.  Listening and clarifying further advance the possibility that conflict can be resolved. 

The New Testament Church was particularly adept at handling disagreement that would impede mission-achievement.   Read more at http://usacanadaregion.org/training-moduleshttp://www.usacanadaregion.org/training-modules.  Click on Resolving Conflict. 

Contributed by Dr. Lyle Pointer

Agenda Harmony

We hear so much in our churches today about the need for unity, and rightfully so!  We have all been witnesses to way too much ugliness and conflict in the church.  But can I propose to you today that unity is about more than just everyone getting along; it’s about everyone coming together and working towards a common goal.  It’s what some would refer to as agenda harmony.

What is agenda harmony?  Looking at the definition of the individual words is very telling.  This is how our good friend Merriam-Webster defines them:

• Agenda – a list or outline of things to be considered or done.
• Harmony – pleasing or congruent arrangement of parts.

So, agenda harmony simply means that the people of the organization or church are unified around the things that must be done to accomplish the mission.  That’s the kind of unity we are interested in.  We are not interested in creating a group of people with an absence of conflict, but we are working diligently to create a group of people who are harmoniously working together to accomplish the mission of the church.

As a sports fan I can think of times when there was dysfunction present in a team and infighting and conflict were the outcome.  We have witnessed plenty of that in the church over the years.  Having said that, it is not enough for us to simply eliminate all the fighting and fussing within our churches.  If we are truly going to revitalize the church it will require everyone working together around a clear mission and vision to transform our world.

It is a beautiful thing to watch a team work together in harmony.  I’m not a fan of the Super Bowl Champion Baltimore Ravens, but I can still watch in admiration what can be accomplished when a team rallies together around a common goal and works in harmony to accomplish that goal.  It’s quite possible that creating this same type of agenda harmony in our churches might cause some non-fans of the church to pause in admiration.  Who knows, maybe they would reconsider their interest in being a part of the church?


Recommended Resources

Jump-Starting the Established Congregation

Preaching Matters

Preaching really does matter.  I was recently reminded of this important truth by a tweet from one of our most recent General Superintendents in the Church of the Nazarene, Dr. David Busic.  He retweeted a quote from Will Willimon that said, “Only the risen Christ explains why preaching does work.”

Outside of the resurrection preaching doesn’t make sense.  But in light of the resurrection we have this awesome privilege to watch God work through what would otherwise seem foolish!  To think that you and I would have anything to say that would transform lives for eternity.  It even sounds ridiculous, but that is the wonder and the majesty of what God has invited us into.

If God has invited you and me to be a part of this thing called “preaching”, wouldn’t it be a reasonable thing that we would seek to do it well?  In Ed Stetzer and Mike Dodson’s book titled Comeback Churches, they point to biblical preaching as a key contributor to the turnaround in the churches they studied.  They write, “Turning a church around requires good preaching.”  

I don’t know any preachers who don’t want their preaching to be “good.”  So, how do we go about working to ensure that we provide the best opportunity for our preaching to be as effective as possible?  Here are some suggestions:

1. Spend more time preparing.  Thom Rainer’s research has shown that pastors of churches that were highly effective in evangelism “spent five times more time in sermon preparation compared to the pastors in the non evangelistic churches.”
2. Listen to other effective communicators.  Technology has made it possible for us to feast on a buffet of effective communicators.  Nearly every church today posts audio or video of their messages online.  Seek out preachers who do it well and listen to their messages regularly.  This will not only spark creative ideas, but you will pick up on things that make them effective.
3. Listen to yourself!  This is a painful exercise at times, but you really need to listen to your own preaching from time to time.  I do this 2-3 times a month and I always pick up on things that I want to improve.  I have a way of slipping into old habits and listening to myself reminds me that I still have a lot of work to do.
4. Ask your peers to listen to you.  Now this is even more uncomfortable than listening to yourself, but is a much needed practice.  Find a trusted colleague and ask them to evaluate one of your messages.  Doing this periodically will help you to identify some blind spots that might be hindering your effectiveness.

Preaching really does matter and as the old saying goes, “If it’s worth doing then it’s worth doing right.” 

Recommended Resources

Comeback Churches: How 300 Churches Turned Around and Yours Can Too by Ed Stetzer & Mike Dodson










Communicating for a Change by Andy Stanley & Lane Jones

Inviting the Unchurched

I live in the Northwest now.  The Bible Belt is several notches away.  The Midwest has not pushed into the frontiers of “unchurchdom.”   When I invited people to church in the Midwest and South, they would usually say, “I know I need to go.”  Not in the Northwest.  I hear comments like, “My husband is an Anglican.”  I was caught by surprise.  Clearly she did not want to consider an invitation to worship.

At other times when I invite people to church, I hear additional strange responses, “We would make lousy recruits for your church.”  “I am not into that.” “I quit church years ago.” “I don’t want to talk about it.”

These responses feel strange to me because I love God’s Church.  I am (but not always) proud of God’s people.  Worshiping week by week nurtures my soul, inspires my best motives and ushers me into God’s presence.  I want others to experience the same.  So I intend to keep asking.

Here are some ways that encourage the unchurched to respond favorably (but not always):

• “Come, see what you think.”  A taste and see approach makes it easier for a person to respond positively.   Refrain from saying “you ought.”  Preaching the third commandment with the unchurched has proven to raise resistance.

• Make a positive prediction.  “I imagine you will be pleased with what you experience.  The people at my church are welcoming.”

• Express excitement about your congregation and what God is doing.

• Ask the unchurched again.  And again.  National surveys show Americans want to be asked.  And they want to take their time in considering the invitation.

Contributed by Dr. Lyle Pointer


Recommended Resources

Inviting the Unchurched training module